Theperineal

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Trump Prepares to Bomb Norway After Nobel Peace Prize Snub

Theperineal13 Oct, 2025Business

President Trump lashes out after losing the Nobel Peace Prize to Maria Corina Machado — now reportedly preparing a shocking plan to “bomb Norway” in protest. Inside the White House chaos, Truth Social rants, and absurd war plans that follow the world’s most surreal Nobel snub. Read the full satirical scoop on The Perineal.

Ghislaine Maxwell to Testify on Epstein Files

Theperineal29 Jul, 2025Business

Ghislaine Maxwell isn’t done yet. From prison bars to Supreme Court briefs, she’s invoking Epstein’s dusty 2007 deal in a shocking legal twist. With whispers of secret flight logs, powerful names, and Trump ties—this scandal just leveled up. Dive into the jaw-dropping drama elites don't want you to read. Click now before it disappears.

Luigi Mangione Promises He’ll Do Better and Pivot to Sexual Assault Crimes If Pardoned

Theperineal03 Jun, 2025News

Luigi Mangione, charged with multiple crimes, has pledged to cease targeting billionaires and instead focus on sexual assault if pardoned by President Trump. Inspired by Diddy's potential pardon, Mangione vows to emulate behaviors of Trump and Diddy, aiming to join their ranks and gain acceptance and support.

DOGE Cuts Needed USAID Funding to Bolivian Tadpoles

Theperineal19 May, 2025Entertainment

Elon Musk and DOGE continue to search for waste, fraud and abuse within the federal government. Yet, some vital programs are also being cut, including USAID funding to provide diapers for incontinent tadpoles in Bolivia. Known as “tad pads” within the USAID building, these diapers are said to improve the self-esteem of the little Bolivian tadpoles as they grow into full blown frogs. Without the $28.9 million to fund this program, there’s no telling how they will turn out.